So, suddenly you find yourself single again, you would love to attract your soul mate but the dating landscape has changed. You swipe left and right (something I only ever did when cleaning my bathroom mirror), you’ve joined all the online sites and still, you keep attracting jerks and not your soul mate! Why you? Why is it that the Universe keeps sending you the smooth talkers, the bootie chasers and straight-up D-heads?

law of attraction

The Law Of Attraction is actually working perfectly. The Universe is sending you everything you are asking for! Yep – sucks to hear that because I know that you’re not sitting up in bed each night writing “Dear Universe please help me attract every jerk you can find’. However, the Law Of Attraction is sending you the guys that match your vibe and match your self-worth.

For example, if you are standing in front of the mirror picking out all the parts of yourself that you dislike – You attract those types of jerks who nitpick your every move.

If you are telling yourself ”you’re not good enough”, no amount of lippy is going to change your vibe and frequency of attraction. And that girlfriend is why you keep attracting jerks.

How to attract your soul mate and Not Jerks

Why you

Be Yourself

Embrace who you really are. If you’re loud, be that. If you’re quiet, be that. If you like dancing naked under the full moon chanting, be that woman.

Be true to your truest nature. Just like you can probably cut through the lies your kids tell you. The Universe also knows the truth. If you aren’t embracing the awesome unique you then you will be sent the D-heads who are always trying to change you and put you down.

Love Yourself

I know that you don’t have the figure or skin elasticity of your 20-year-old self. However, I also know that every woman is sexy and beautiful in their own way.

We are like roses, each different, each beautiful. Check-in with how you speak to yourself. If you are putting yourself down, talking to yourself worse than you would…any. other.human – Stop! Love Your Self your gorgeous

Find some uplifting mantras and affirmations that will help you with your self-talk. Or borrow mine…

“The older I get the sexier, smarter and more energised I become.”

Look in the mirror and say it out loud
Next time you’re in the shower sing it out loud
Next time you are belting out your favourite song in the car – Say it out loud.

Own it, baby, because You Are Beautiful


Remember that the Universe is sending you all the dudes that match your vibe and frequency. Which means if you’re scrolling through Insta or FB reading all the quotes and posts that drag your energy down – Unfollow.

Unfollow all the accounts that make you feel like shit about you and others. Even the posts about how men are jerks. Unfollow

Know Yourself

Get to know you. Know what you love eating and doing. Know how you need to be loved (5-love languages by Gary Chapman is a great resource). Know your values and what you stand for.

Know that you are not broken and you do not need a partner to fix you OR make you whole and….

Don’t settle for second best!

I get it that us women feel the need to take the broken birds (aka men) and try to put them back together. But if it means that it saps your happiness and joy. Leave it be.


Trust Your Gut

Sister, you were not given a sixth sense only to ignore it (I know you know what I mean). That feeling you get that something is off or weird, you can’t quite put your finger on it but it doesn’t feel right. Trust your gut. Your intuition is guiding you towards your soul mate, protecting you.

Don’t Rush

If you’re anything like me patience is not your strong suit. But in matters of meeting the man of your dreams…Take your time. The heart knows what it desires, however our hormones and fear of forever being alone messes with our heads. Take your time, your true soul mate and partner will totally understand. Plus you don’t want a relationship that doesn’t make you feel connected, supported, challenged and loved because you rushed in out of fear.

Your soulmate is there to add colour and value to your life. They come into your life to complement you and teach you how to grow and evolve into the best version of you.

You only attract your soulmate when your bursting in love with yourself

Wish you had more love, greater ease and better boundaries in your life?

what to do if you hate yourself

It’s time to put yourself first without feeling stressed out, guilty or overwhelmed

If you are feeling:

Tired, frustrated & desperate to get off the treadmill of disappointment, self-doubt, and self-criticism.

I GET IT. I’ve been there.

Lack of self-worth and self-love manifests in different ways & impacts those we love most.

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