Why do I keep having arguments with my partner?

You’re lying awake in bed after having another argument with the person you love *sigh*. You’re wondering why this keeps on happening? Why do I keep having arguments with my partner? Here are three reasons why this may be happening.

Why do I keep having arguments with my partner?

1. You’re disconnected from yourself.

Let’s be real life is hectic and before we realise it we can get swept up in our to-do lists, work commitments and all the other things going on. What this does however is it causes us to disconnect from ourselves. We start to feel harried and resentful. So instead take 5 minutes and make a list of things you love doing and commit to doing one a day. Tune back into what brings you joy, what brings you peace, ignites your excitement for life

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2. You’re trying to change them 

Whilst you may not see that you are. You probably are. I know I was certainly guilty of this in my relationship. People don’t like to be told what to do, and most don’t like being “told” to change and this causes arguments. Instead have a discussion about your needs with your partner and your desires. Whilst also allowing them to share theirs. Together create a plan to move forward that supports you both together without blame or judgement 

3. You’re not meeting their love language 

If you haven’t heard of the 5 love languages you must check out the quiz here. Essentially we all have a love language that is unique to us and when we aren’t having this met we feel “unloved” so instead of seeking help or openly talking with our partners we pick arguments to get their attention (just like when we were little and wanted the chocolate but couldn’t have it) 

If you have different love languages, once the flush of new love fades you can feel unappreciated and unloved by your partner. This isn’t always the case we just aren’t speaking each other’s love language. Take time to know your love language and that of your partners.

Note: Seek to fulfil your own whilst meeting theirs.